Author Archives: Jane

The Ultimate Cure for Perfectionism

Posted on by
6

I’m my own worst critic. Part of the problem is that I’m there to witness every one of my mistakes! Sometimes I attempt something and fail to perform as well as I think I could have. Other times I berate myself because I think I should have done something but didn’t even try. Either way, I am well-acquainted with that voice in my head that loves to remind me that I’ve fallen short.

th[10]That pesky internal companion has pressured me to perform “perfectly” since I was very young. As a child, I was driven to get straight A’s. My parents never overtly demanded honor roll achievement. Yet looking back, I recognize that they were perfectionists in their own right, whether it was striving for flawless Christian behavior, plowing the straightest corn rows, or keeping an immaculate house. I definitely inherited the perfectionist gene. Continue reading →

Seeing Red

Posted on by
4

I originally wrote this material for inclusion in a women’s devotional book on Proverbs. It describes a situation that occurred when I was completing a college internship as a summer park ranger in Southern Oregon.

********************************************************************************

“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

Proverbs 15:1, NASB

thX2EURAI7“You’re a communist!” the agitated man shouted. The circle of people tightened around me. I flipped my army-green notepad shut, concealing the license plate numbers I had just recorded.

The leader of the group motioned angrily at my notepad. “Did you put my number in there?”

“Yes, I did,” I answered gently. “You and your friends are camping in an unauthorized site this evening.”

He swore in response. “Ah-h, the next thing you know, these park rangers are going to tell us when we can brush our teeth!” Continue reading →

When Sudden Death Strikes

Posted on by
9

th[2]My coworkers and I received the sad news last week that one of our colleagues had passed away. It was a shocking revelation to many, as few knew how ill he was.   Only a few days before his death he had learned that he had stage four cancer.  Most employees hadn’t even heard about the diagnosis, let alone that he was near death. As I sat with my coworkers at his funeral just days ago, many of us were still reeling from the abrupt loss. I couldn’t help but think back to the first time I was faced with the sudden death of a colleague. I was much younger—in my late-twenties, and Jeannette’s passing hit me with much greater intensity. We had not only been teammates in a tight-knit Christian camping ministry,  we were very close friends and neighbors. The post below is based on the article I wrote in response to my first experience with sudden loss and grief. It also turned out to be my first published piece in a national Christian magazine. Continue reading →

The Garage Sale Couch

Posted on by
4

I was a contributor to a women’s devotional book on Proverbs years ago.  This post is a re-print of that piece.  I’m happy to report that I have upgraded my couch since then.

———————————————————————————————

“Do not withhold good . . .when it is in your power to do it.”

Proverbs 3:37, NASB

Kathryn looked gaunt as she approached me after church. Her normally glistening auburn hair hung listlessly.

“Hi, how are you?” I said.

“Not well at all,” she said quietly, her voice quavering slightly.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, shifting uncomfortably.

“My new job hasn’t worked out. I have to be out of my apartment by Friday, and I have no place to stay.” She looked at me with a glimmer of hope.

“Oh, that’s too bad. I’m really sorry,” I said, just as another friend interrupted our conversation.

All evening Kathryn remained on my mind. I sensed the Holy Spirit nudging me. “I have presented you with a need, and you have the means to help.” It was true. I did live alone, and Kathryn could sleep on my garage-sale couch until she found an alternative. Continue reading →

Chronic Fatigue – Vanishing Spoons (Part 2)

Posted on by
8

thNVFN4H4ATo understand the full context, I recommend reading Vanishing Spoons (Part 1) first.

**************************************************************************************

I awoke the next morning feeling like I had been hit by a truck. My head ached and I felt an oozy sickness just asking my brain to process simple tasks. Getting ready for work took Herculean effort. I was clearly experiencing SSD (Serious Spoon Deficit).

Yet off to work I went.   It would not be the first (or the last) time I would press on despite feeling horrible.   Thankfully it was a quiet morning. Although my brain was crying out for reprieve, I urged it to keep performing. I responded to emails, worked on project details, and miraculously drafted coherent correspondence.   I was thankful I had survived the morning, but I knew I had pushed it as far as I could. The proverbial “wall” was fast approaching, and I was on a collision course with it. By noon, my gracious and accommodating supervisor understood that I needed to go home for the day.

That afternoon it all caved in. Continue reading →